Mr Marquez
by PandaFire McMango
Summary: Mimi and Angel decide to find out if Mimi would make as good a guy as she does a girl. Includes crossdressing...not only Angel, for once! Might get a little wacky...BUT WHO CARES! CollinsAngel MimiRoger MoJo to follow...now finally complete!
1. The Idea

**this is just a new little idea i had today. it's pretty weird, and if you can't figure out what the hell they're talking about, the next chapter will be up soon, so don't worry! reviews will determine its progress.**

"Angel?"

"Hmm?"

"Why do you like to dress like you do?"

"Yeah…sure."

"Angel, are you listening?"

"I agree…"

"ANGEL!"

"What, what is it?" Angel sat up and looked over her shoulder at Mimi, who was sitting cross-legged on the floor, playing around with her hair. Angel had been lying on her back on the bed, reading a book entitled _How to Tell if the World's Gone Crazy or if it's Just You._ Outside, snow fell lightly to the ground, dusting the sidewalk with a fuzzy carpet of white. Collins and Joanne were at work, Roger was having an emo moment and "needed to be alone" at the loft, and Mark was helping Maureen out with her next piece. The two friends were hanging out at Angel's house until the congregation at the Life later that night.

"I asked why you dress the way you do." Angel's brow knitted with confusion.

"Hon, you spend time with me almost every day and you don't know that?" Mimi rolled her eyes and set down the brush she had been absently trailing through her hair.

"I know you're gay, Angel, if that's what you mean. What I'm saying is you could be like Collins: you know, dressing and act—" Angel waved a finger warningly, "—ok, fine, just dressing in guy's clothes. But you don't. Why?" Angel sighed and flopped onto her stomach, propping herself up with her elbows. She shrugged.

"It's just…something inside, I guess. Feeling comfortable. Feeling like I'm wearing the right thing. I mean, how would you feel if you had to wade around in Roger's clothes all day?" Mimi made a face.

"I think I'd drown in those baggy pants, for one thing." Angel snorted.

"See? You wouldn't feel right in guys' clothes. I don't feel right in them either. I'm just special that way." Angel was about to pick up her book again when Mimi interrupted her.

"But you wear guys' clothes all the time. Like when you're drumming or you don't want to spend time with makeup. Do you hate that?" Angel looked back at her.

"Mimi, that's stupid. I wouldn't do it if I hated it. But it's just…girl, I'm like you. You would probably wear guys' clothes every once in a while if you could, right? I mean, if you owned any." Mimi frowned.

"For what?"

"For when you don't want to do makeup or for when you just want to be relax. Guys' clothes can be pretty comfy when they need to be." Mimi raised her eyebrows. "But that doesn't mean I love to wear on a day-to-day basis. I just love wearing women's clothes. Is there something wrong with that?"

"No, no, no, sorry, sorry, sorry." Mimi waved her hands as if fending off an attacked. Satisfied, Angel reached for her book again. And per usual, Mimi interrupted her again.

"Hey, Angel…"

"Wha-at?" groaned her friend, flopping onto her back and peering upside down at Mimi, who giggled and crossed her arms.

"How do you know I don't feel right in guys' clothes?" Angel rolled her eyes. Upside down.

"I don't. Fine, are you suggesting that we…" she trailed off, a thought entering her mind. A grin slowly spread across her face. "We couldn't."

"And yet, we so totally could." Mimi was bouncing up and down. Angel turned right side up and raised an eyebrow.

"How far would we be going with this?" Mimi shrugged.

"We could just do it here…or we could take it outside, depending on how well it works. See if other people know the difference." Angel nodded.

"Maybe even _certain_ other people." Mimi's grin spread, pleased as she was that Angel had caught on so fast.

"C'mon, girl. Aren't you _dying_ to know if we can pull it off?" Angel squirmed in place, shoved between her conscience and her desperate urge and wish to go through with it. Finally she groaned and sat up.

"This is going to end in disaster, I just know it." Mimi squealed and got to her feet, grabbing Angel's hands and pulling her up too. Angel pushed a black strand of her wig behind one ear and squared her shoulders.

"Now, let's see. First things first, we need to see which of my guy clothes are small enough to fit you."

**hehehehe...**


	2. Trying It On

**ah, this is fun. my hope is that this will blossom into a much bigger fic. i need reviews for that though wink, wink, so i'm counting on you, chickies!**

"Let's see. Shirts…" Angel crouched down and pulled out the bottom drawer of the small dresser that housed part of her wardrobe. Neatly folded and arranged were a variety of men's shirts, ranging from basic rags to almost fancy button-ups. Mimi peered into the drawer over Angel's shoulders.

"Jesus, Angel, you have a shitload of shirts…hey, isn't that Collins'?" she asked, pointing a denim shirt that quite obviously belonged to Collins. Angel shrugged.

"Probably. I mix them up sometimes. You know how it is when you're putting away both your clothes and his the morning after you've had—"

"Yeah, gotcha, what do you think will fit?' interrupted Mimi hurriedly. Angel rolled her eyes and then appraised the collection of shirts.

"Hmm…how about this? And this?" She drew out a white t-shirt and a thick, dark green sweater. Mimi eyed the doubtfully.

"I dunno…"

"Oh, you'll look great. Now let's look at pants." She slid in the drawer and looked at the one above it. It was full of folded pants: mostly the thick men's jeans that stand up on their own. Mimi frowned.

"Where are your kick-ass sparkly jeans?" Angel jerked her head backwards.

"I keep them with my other clothes. You're right, they are kick-ass. Ok now, these are the smallest ones that will look right." She drew out a pair of stiff, light blue jeans. After that, they rounded up a battered leathery belt, some socks, Angel's oldest, smallest sneakers, and a Mets cap ("reserved only for occasions like this", Angel assured Mimi). With all of it hugged in her arms, Mimi disappeared into the bathroom to change. Angel sat on the bed and picked up her book, leafing forward to her page. She was just finishing a paragraph when she heard Mimi come out of the bathroom. She looked up…

"Well, what do you think?" Mimi said, striking a pose. Angel's mouth fell open slightly, and Mimi frowned.

"Stop staring. If it's that bad, I might as well—"

"Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no, you don't look bad, you look…oh, for fuck's sake, Mimi, didn't you look in the mirror?" Mimi shook her head. Angel groaned and got up, steering Mimi into the bathroom by her shoulders. She stood her in front of the mirror firmly and said, "There. Is that bad?" Mimi didn't answer. She couldn't.

Staring out at her from the mirror was a guy. A man who looked a few years younger than Angel, with a smooth, shaven face and big brown eyes. The sweater bagged on her body enough to hide her chest, and you would have never guessed that under those jeans were legs that half the women in New York City would have given their right hand for. Her ass was hidden beneath the back pockets of the jeans, and the sweater sleeves were long enough to cover her slender wrists. The beautiful flowing hair that Mimi was so proud of was tucked neatly underneath the cap, and without her makeup, Mimi could conceivably have a really, _really_ girly-faced guy.

"Oh my god," she said, grabbing Angel's arm. "I'm…I'm…"

"Hot," said Angel casually. Mimi whirled around to stare at her.

"_What_?"

"Calm down, calm down, I'm not going to get a crush on you or anything. I'm a one-man kind of drag queen. And really, how freakishly creepy would that be?" Mimi shivered at the thought. "But seriously," Angel said, turning Mimi back to the mirror. "I'd bet my heels that any self-respecting gay or girl wouldn't need a second glance to want to ask you out. Of course, adding some muscles wouldn't hurt," she mused, squeezing Mimi's upper arms. Mimi shook her off.

"Hon," Angel said, looking her up and down approvingly, "you make a great guy." Mimi shrugged and sighed.

"Fine. But am I a good enough guy to convince someone else?" Angel raised her eyebrows.

"Sherlock Homes couldn't figure out that there was a pretty little ass under those jeans, Mimi. You're safe." Mimi grinned.

"The question is, would he be looking for it?" Angel laughed.

"You never know. He spent all his time living with this short little Englishman. We all have our preferences." Mimi giggled. Moving to the door, she shrugged her shoulders.

"So, are you gonna teach me how to be a guy or not?"

**hee hee hee...**


	3. Lessons

**hee hee. there are many questions in this fic, no? I guess Mimi is just a curious little girlie, huh...  
**

"Ok, first things first," said Angel, sitting Mimi down on the bed and kneeling behind her. "Your hair is coming out from underneath the hat back here. I'm going to braid it so it stays, okay? Then I get to teach you to be a guy."

"Sure," Mimi said, taking off the cap and letting her long brown hair cascade down her back. Angel separated the hair into three thick strands and expertly began to braid it.

"Angel?" said Mimi tentatively. Angel nudged her with her elbow as a sign to go on. Mimi sighed.

"This might be a weird question…but what is it like to be gay?" Angel paused and frowned at the back of Mimi's head.

"Full of questions today, aren't we? And Mimi, if I answer this one, let's not experiment with it, okay?" Mimi snorted and shrugged.

"Duh. But I dunno, I just…I'm sort of wondering. After all, Maureen went from being straight to being a lesbian. Why? Other than Mark, of course." Angel pulled the strands to tighten the braid, then started working again.

"I can't answer for her. But Mimi, it's not any different from being straight, when you get right down to it. It's…shit."

"It's shit?" Mimi asked confusedly. Angel rolled her eyes.

"No, I said shit because I fucked this up. I need to start over a little." Angel pulled apart the overlapping strands and began to do them again. Mimi snorted.

"Nice. Go on." Angel sighed.

"It's just who you think is sexy and who you don't, basically. And also who you think you can like or love _that_ way, you know? I mean, chica, you're my best friend and I love you to bits, but most definitely not _that_ way, right?" Mimi nodded. "And I do love Collins _that_ way."

"But if he wasn't a guy, would you be able to love him _that_ way?" Angel rolled her eyes and looked around for a rubber band.

"Mimi, we're getting into things that I really just can't explain. It's not an explainable kind of thing. Ah, here we go," she said, snagging a rubber band from the bedpost and snapping it around the end of the braid. She expertly coiled up the thick rope of hair and laid it flat against Mimi's head, sliding the cap over it before any hair could escape. Mimi bounced off the bed and stood facing Angel, feet apart and hands on her hips.

"Are we ready?"

"Yep," Angel said, getting up and circling her friend. "Hmmm…first of all, you really can't stand up so straight, hon." Mimi frowned.

"You guys always tell me I slouch."

"You do, but not enough to be a guy. Here." Angel put one hand on Mimi's stomach and the other on her upper back, pushing them in opposite directions. Mimi's torso folded forward until she was slumped into a perfect disaffected, male slouch. Angel stood back and nodded satisfactorily.

"Good! Now let's see…walk a few steps." Mimi did so, keeping her slouch immaculate. Angel shook her head.

"Uh-uh. You walk like you're wearing heels. Not gonna work." Mimi gestured at her feet.

"Teach, master." Angel giggled and demonstrated the proper walk, her stride thick and her feet slightly clomping. Mimi laughed so hard when she saw it that she rolled backwards onto the bed. Angel threw a sock at her.

"Stop laughing, you idiot!" she said, laughing herself. Mimi gasped for breath.

"Oh Jesus…Angel, never do that again or I'm going to break a rib…" Angel poked her hand in the stomach. Mimi shrieked and sat up. Angel smirked.

"Now let's see you do it." Mimi tried, but she was still mincing too much. It was a little while before she could do the natural stomp that most men used. Angel looked proud.

"Ok, chica. Now we go to the next level."

_Movie montage. "Dude Looks Like A Lady" song blasting the background while scenes of Angel teaching Mimi different stuff flash on and off. How to eat, how to talk, how to scowl. And most importantly, what to say. Movie montages are fun! Dum de dum…okiedoke, back to the fic!_

"Mimi, I think you're ready," said Angel, stepping back and surveying her work. Mimi was perfect: the slouch, the scowl, and the dangling arms. It made Angel very happy.

"Okay, now. Say hi to me." Mimi raised one hand lazily.

"How's it going?" she said in a low, husky voice. Angel bit her lip very hard to keep from laughing.

"Now tell me your name." Mimi stood up straight and crossed her arms.

"Angel, why the hell did you choose that name? It's just plain stupid," she protested in her normal voice. Angel sighed.

"Because it's the kind of name a guy like you would have, okay? My name is Angel; do you think any straight guy would be happy to have this name?"

"Well—oh, just forget it. Fine." Mimi slumped back down, coughed, and said in her husky voice, "Hey man, I'm Ray—Raymundo." Angel couldn't help it. She burst out laughing and sank back against the wall, doubling up in hysterics. Mimi shot her a killer glare and stuck her hand on her hip.

"See? You can't even be serious about it. I'm not using that name." Angel gasped, managed to stop laughing, and grabbed her arm.

"Oh yes you are. Now come on. I think you're ready, and we have to meet the others in the Life at 6."

**this nect chapter is going to be amusing.**


	4. Journey and Waiting

**very short, but i wanted a chapter before the meeting. i can't wait to write the next one...hee hee. btw, my monthly angst fic was taken down because someone thought i copied it from someone else. i wanted to say sorry to the person who wrote the original story, for publishing one that was like theirs. i wrote that fic before i read theirs, however i did borrow a couple things (i'm not above using things that work really well, and there were quite a few in that fic). your story was amazing, and i'm sorry someone thought i copied it. i took it down to take away confusion. it'll probably be up later.**

**aaaaaaanyway, here ya go!**

Angel walked up the street, keeping a tight hold on Mimi's arm. Mimi was digging in her heels, glancing around self-consciously at passing people. Angel rolled her eyes.

"Hon, this was your idea. We're in it together now; and you are not backing out." Mimi groaned and started walking, the jeans flapping on her legs. She patted the top of her hat.

"You can see my hair; you can so totally see my hair." Angel rolled her eyes.

"No you can't, and stop fussing. It's all going to be all right. The only—never mind." Mimi stopped in her tracks and stared at Angel. Angel sighed and turned to her.

"What now?"

"What were you going to say? About something only?" Angel shrugged.

"Nothing. I was just saying random things, drop it and let's go." And before Mimi could resist, Angel dragged her into the train station. Angel bit her lip as they walked down the stairs. She had been about offer up a worst-case scenario. Not a good idea.

The subway ride was interesting. As Angel predicted, Mimi merited more than a few glances from various guys and girls. She didn't exactly like it very much. To be specific, she tried to hide underneath her sweater, like a turtle. Angel nudged her, and Mimi's head slowly poked up from the top of the sweater. She was frowning.

"Angel, can't we forget this? It was funny before, but now…:" Angel shook her head.

"I've spent too much time on you, girl. You're going through with it." Mimi moaned and sank back into her sweater. Angel stifled a laugh.

They reached the stop and got out, Angel nearly dragging Mimi now. Mimi moaned and plodded along reluctantly. Angel wasn't fooled. She knew Mimi better than almost anyone else, and that meant she knew that Mimi was possibly even a bigger drama queen than Maureen at times. She couldn't wait to do it. However, she couldn't bear to go without the complaining.

_The Life…_

"Where the hell are they?" wondered Collins, checking the clock on the wall for the millionth time. Roger shrugged and craned his head to peer at the clock as well. Mark ground his teeth together and pushed Maureen away from his hair.

"I don't care if they're late, Maureen, you cannot do my hair! You'll just have to wait for Mimi!" Maureen looked offended. She wrapped her arms around Joanne, who sighed. Maureen pouted and pressed her cheek against Joanne's.

"Poooooookieeeee, you could let me do _your_ hair…" Joanne groaned.

"No, Maureen! I've seen what you do to Mimi's hair, and I am not letting you at mine!" Maureen groaned even louder than Joanne had flopped backwards over the table, gazing upwards at Collins. He looked down and flicked her forehead with one finger. She squealed and rubbed the place he had flicked.

"Collins, that was mean! And you have like, no hair, so I can't do yours…" Mark snorted into his hand. Collins glared at her.

"I have hair! I just wear a hat, is that a crime?" Maureen grinned upside down and reached up to tug the brim of his cap down over his eyes. He swatted her hand away. She rolled her eyes.

"Collins, you know I love your Marvin Gaye hat…it's just that you never take it off." Roger crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow.

"You really don't, Col." Collins glared at him too.

"I do so take it off!" Mark nodded skeptically. Meanwhile, Joanne was choking down painful laughter. Maureen sat up and put one hand on her hip looking over her shoulder at Collins.

"I'll ask Angel just to make sure. If she doesn't know, no one does." She ducked as Collins aimed a blow at her head. Maureen slid off the table into Joanne's lap, grinning at how well she had annoyed Collins. The others laughed. Roger checked the clock again.

"Speaking of Angel, those two should have been here ages ago. What do you think—"

"There Angel is!" Mark exclaimed, pointing to the door. They all turned and looked where he was pointing. Maureen frowned.

"Angel's there, but where's Mimi? And who…" Her voice trailed off into silence. She didn't need to say it. They were all wondering the same thing.

_Who the hell was that guy with Angel?_


	5. The Meeting

**hey! Christmas chapter up!!! ** **This is probably the second-to-last one, the next one being their reactions. I'm sorry, but it was just fun to write. Wouldn't you do this if you could?**

"Hey guys, what's up? Sorry I'm late…" Angel bustled over, dragging the strange young man by his arm. Maureen and Joanne glanced at each other. Mark and Collins just stared at the newcomer. Roger frowned.

"Where's Mimi? I thought she was with you." Angel shrugged.

"She had some stuff to do. She'll probably be here later. But wait, I need to introduce you all. This is a friend of mine, Ra—Carlos." Angel stumbled over the name as though she had meant to say another. "I ran into him on the way here. We haven't seen each other in ages! Carlos, this is Maureen, Joanne, Mark, Roger, and Collins." Carlos, whose Mets cap was pulled low over his eyes, shrugged. He pulled out a chair, turned it backwards, and sat in it, his crossed arms resting on the back. Angel sat down next to him.

"Hey." His voice was slightly hoarse. No one quite knew how to respond. This guy seemed a little…creepy. Not the kind of person Angel would usually be friends with. Plus, he almost looked familiar…as though they had met him before. Mark cleared his throat.

"Um…hi. I'm Mark…sorry, have I ever seen you before?" Carlos shifted in his chair.

"I don't think so. I wouldn't forget that kind of skin. Your mom must have been smoking something strong for you to be that damn white, man." Mark's mouth dropped open slightly. The others exchanged stunned looks. This was DEFINITELY not the kind of guy Angel would be friends with.

"Carlos, don't say stuff like that!" Angel exclaimed, elbowing him in the ribs. Carlos shrugged again.

"My bad. Sorry." His tone was sneering and rather smug. Mark's made a sort of strangled noise in his throat and closed his mouth.

"So…where do you and Angel know each other from?" Maureen asked, trying to break the awkward silence. Carlos didn't respond for a second or two; then he slowly turned towards her, dark eyes flashing from under the brim of his cap.

"None of your business, baby, none of your business." Maureen ground her teeth. No one other than her friends called her baby and lived to tell the tale. Angel stepped on Carlos' toe under the table. It was one thing to insult Mark like that, but it wouldn't exactly be a successful move to provoke Maureen.

"Hey, you—"

"Mo, let it go, I'm sorry about him. He's just…not used to this." Collins was glaring at this guy with more than a little suspicion. Mark and Maureen were pretty pissed off, and Joanne was creeped out. Roger was still distracted by wondering where Mimi was.

"Hey, what's that?" asked Carlos suddenly, pointing at Mark's camera. It was sitting on the table, a few inches from his outstretched hand. Mark snatched it up protectively.

"My camera. Why?" Carlos snorted derisively.

"Yeah, sure. You a movie maker, Casper?" Mark glared. Maureen leapt up.

"Don't call him that! Who the hell do you think you are?"

"Easy, lady, I'm not going to make fun of him, I'm just curious." Angel sighed.

"Leave him alone, Carlos, Mark's a little touchy about his camera." Carlos snorted again.

"Gonna be the next Spielberg, huh? Gonna make a better movie than Star Wars, right?" By now, everyone at the table was either really mad or really freaked out. This guy could not be a friend of Angel's, no matter what she said. And there was no logical reason for her calm reactions to his insults. Normally, she'd be one of the ones getting angry at this kind of jerk. Collins, who had continued glaring at Carlos, now leaned forward.

"Man, I don't know who you are, but you are definitely pissing all of us off. Angel, who the hell is he?" Angel rolled her eyes.

"Hon, Carlos isn't used to this kind of situation, I told you. Just relax and—"

"Save your breath. If he wants to complain, let him. I think I have an answer for him." Carlos sat back and raised one eyebrow. "What's your problem with me, _man_?" He sneered. Collins didn't stand up, but leaned back and crossed his arms, glaring. Roger spoke up.

"I think his problem is that you've been shooting off your mouth a whole lot and we're getting pretty tired of it." Carlos made a weird sound; like he was swallowing a laugh. Then he sighed as though Roger was a noisy little kid.

"So you're saying that they're offended by my…comments?" Maureen growled.

"You can take that 'offended' and—"

"Maureen!" Joanne kicked her under the table. Maureen yelped and glared. Carlos laughed raspily.

"Oh, real nice…" Collins opened his mouth to say something, but Roger got there first. He stood up angrily.

"Man, I'm getting really pissed off now, I think you better leave!" Collins stood up too. Under the table, Angel nudged Carlos' leg. Carlos smiled sweetly—why did that smile look so amazingly familiar—and stood up too.

"Hey, it's not my fault I'm here. You all asked me to come…especially you, Roger." That made everyone do a double take. Collins turned to Roger with raised eyebrows. Roger looked baffled.

"But…I don't know you; I've never seen you before in my life!" Carlos chuckled.

"Your recognition skills are really impressive, baby." And he swept off his hat. A braid tumbled down his back, and with a fluid motion Angel reached up and pulled off the rubber band. Carlos shook his head, and the braid unraveled, turning into a mass of long brown hair. It settled on his back, long and wavy from being braided. Carlos—or rather, Mimi—grinned at the stunned faces around her.

"Hi, guys. Miss me?"

**Hee hee...Marky is a ghost boy...hee hee...**


	6. Congratulations

**hee hee, fun chapter. this might be the last one, though i think i have one more for this story left in me. dunno. anyway, Happy New Year to those of you who i haven't said that to yet! it's gonna be a Happy New year! A Happy New Year...damn, now all i need are Collins and Angel is Pussy Galore and James Bond regalia. Then all would be pretty perfect.**

"Oh my—holy shit!" Maureen gasped, her eyes bugging. Joanne's mouth fell open, and Mark blanched with shock. Collins mouthed wordlessly, looking back and forth between Mimi and Angel, both of whom looked painfully smug. Roger gave a sort of strangled shout and sat heavily. Angel looked down to stop herself from giggling insanely.

"You people," Mimi said, her voice wavering with the effort not to laugh, "are so gullible, it's not even—I'm sorry, I just can't!" Mimi burst into laughter, doubling up and clutching her stomach with the force of the hysterics. She started Angel off, and before long the two of them were almost literally rolling on the floor. The others watched them silently, still pretty damn shocked by the whole thing.

"Oh man, oh man…you are all so _blind_," Mimi gasped, wiping tears from her eyes. Maureen finally found words.

"…Blind? Mimi, you looked more like a man than Roger does!"

"Hey!"

"Oh, be quiet, Roger, I can't help it if that's the truth. But how the hell—Mimi, that was incredible!" Joanne raised her eyebrows.

"How did you pull it off? I mean…jeez, that's really weird…" Mimi grinned and held out her hand. Angel proudly slapped it, then bobbed her head in a small bow.

"We didn't do a thing, other than tying up her hair and getting her the right clothes. It makes no sense, but our Mimi can look that much like a guy with absolutely no effort. Go figure." Collins and Roger were still trying to process the whole thing. Very slowly, Collins pointed at Mimi.

"You mean…he was…and she was…and they…no, wait…why the hell did you two even do this in the first place?" Mimi giggled.

"Collins, do we need a reason for everything? And besides, you saw me. Look at this—" She reached up and gathered her hair into a bundle, tucking it under the cap again, "—and tell me I don't look creepily like a real guy." Collins snorted.

"Creepily? Mimi, I've seen guys who look less like guys than you do."

"Like Roger?"

"Maureen!"

"Sorry, Pookie, but he's just so—"

"I can't believe it…did you fool other people?" Mimi nodded to her boyfriend's question. Angel patted Mimi on the back.

"There was this one guy who was eyeballing her on the subway."

"He kept licking his lips too…" Mimi shuddered. The others couldn't help it; they had to laugh.

"Wait…" Mark said tentatively. They all turned to him.

"What, Mark?" His eyes were wide behind his glasses, and he looked like a little kid. His upper lip trembled.

"Do…do you really think I'm pale?"

Silence.

"Mark, honey…have you looked in a mirror? Ever?" Angel said gently. Collins ducked his head down so Mark wouldn't seem him struggling not to guffaw. Roger snorted and Mimi giggled. Maureen rolled her eyes.

"Mark, you're whiter than that horrible 'Fruit on the Bottom' yogurt when you open the carton." Joanne poked her in the arm.

"Ouch! Pookie, I'm telling the truth!"

"Anyway, I think Mimi and I should get some sort of award for our work. Did you notice how every masterful her ensemble is? I deserve a plaque at least." Roger rolled his eyes. Collins raised an eyebrow.

"How about we don't get you two back for what Mimi said and for tricking us? Is that a good reward?" Angel pouted and got up, walking around the table and settling herself in Collin's lap.

"Now, be fair. Is it _our _fault that you're all blind and you fell for it? Did we make you take what she said seriously? Did we? Hmm?" She smiled innocently at him. Roger spotted this in alarm.

"Collins…" he said, his voice warning. "Collins, resist it…help me make them pay, don't get sucked in by the whole Bambi eyes deal…Collins, stay with me, man…"

"Oh, grow up, baby," Mimi said, rolling her eyes and smacking Roger on the arm. He glared at her. She sighed and swung herself up onto the table, perching with her legs crossed daintily right in front of Roger. He put on his 'you can't get through my shell' look and faced her. Mimi smiled slightly.

"Baby, we were just playing a little joke…c'mon, forgive me?" She stuck out her lower lip and made her eyes big. Roger squirmed in his seat. Maureen squeaked with laughter and buried her head in her hands.

"No…no, you two were pretty damn evil," Roger said decisively. Mimi slid off the table, plopping onto his lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck and brought her face very close to his.

"Pleeeeaaaase?" Mimi's voice could have cajoled an angry bull to let its tummy be scratched. Roger was no match for it.

"All right, all right, I forgive you," he muttered. Mimi squealed and pulled his into a giant kiss. Joanne rolled her eyes and grinned, while Mark, Angel, and Collins burst into laughter. That was because Maureen had taken a napkin, written _9.8_ on it in big, blocky letters, and held it up with a completely straight, solemn face, like an Olympic judge. She turned to the left and the right to exhibit it, then put it down and dipped her head in a bow. Joanne giggled.

"What was that, Mimi's score?" Maureen shrugged.

"I thought she was going to lose a lot of points on the second try, but she did a great job. I gave her extra points for the eyes and for that smooch." She eyed Mimi and Roger, who were still meshed together. "They hold that for another ten seconds and I up their score to a perfect _10_." Angel snorted with laughter and let her head rest on Collins' shoulder.

"Marky, I'm sorry she said that. And Maureen, I'm sorry too. You guys know it was just a little game, right?" Mark shrugged.

"I didn't really care. You sort of know that you're pale when more than fifty people have called you Albino Boy and Wonder Whitey."

"Oh, for the love of—" Collins clapped a hand over his mouth, but it didn't stop the burst of laughter from getting through. Maureen giggled.

"Mark, you realize that Collins is going to use that Wonder Whitey thing against you for the rest of your life." Mark moaned.

"I'll just hang myself now and get it over with."

"Maureen, they made it to thirteen seconds," Joanne pointed out, calling Maureen's attention to Mimi and Roger. They had just burst apart and were breathing heavily from lack of air. Maureen held out her hand, face once again ramrod straight.

"Congratulations, you two." Mimi looked confused.

"Did we win something?"

"Don't try to figure it out," Collins advised. "Just say thanks." Mimi grinned and shook Maureen's hand.

"Thanks."

**rather short, but i am stressed lately, and i am trying to update as often as possible. sorry!**


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